Friday 29 January 2010

Tony Blair to the rescue

THE SHOW TRIAL OF A FORMER PM:
The Attack on Iraq Was a Just Cause

Tony Blair will be grilled today by a parliamentary committee, putting the former prime minister on the spot to explain the reasoning for going to war against Iraq's dictator Saddam Hussein in the aftermath of the 9-11 atrocities. Earlier, the committee heard provincial barristers testify, using far-flung philosophical arguments to construe a scenario that found the Allied response against war-mongering Iraq as "lacking legal base."

It is clear that the purpose of the inquest is not a truthful reflection on events since 2002 - and before, for that matter - but rather grasping for the only opportunity to besmear the campaign to oust the world's foremost villain in power and to ridicule Allied sacrifices in the military effort.

What was the reasoning behind the prolonged and methodical strategy to eradicate for good Saddam Hussein as a formidable threat to global peace?

World peace was first at stake in the 1980s when Saddam Hussein unleashed a war against neighbouring Iran and invaded oil fields and foreign land. 900,000 Iranians were killed, together with some 600,000 Iraqis; more than half of the casualties were civilians. When the war ended in a stalemate, Saddam shifted his attention to domestic foes, ordering the massacres of tens of thousands of Kurds and Shiites mainly in southern and eastern Iraq. Faced with the mass murders taking place, the UN passed first resolutions to reign in the killing fields in Iraq.

In 1990 Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait, temporarily chasing the rulers out of the country, ruining the economy of what he considered an Iraqi province, killed nearly 4,000 Kuwait citizens and, after being attacked and nearly annihilated by a UN force made up of troops from 82 countries, was forced to abandon Kuwait. Even in retreat Saddam Hussein showed his characteristic ruthlessness: all oil wells of Kuwait were set ablaze, leading to an enormous environmental catastrophe. The sun was obscured for over 60 days, leading to a temperature drop of 8 degrees in the wider Gulf region. The financial damage to Kuwait amounted to $46 billion.

The UN imposed No-Fly zones in northern and southern Iraq to protect the large minorities from routine bombings by Saddam's air force. Limited to ground force, Saddam ordered the use of weapons of mass destruction - mustard and sarin gas - to kill thousands of Kurds and Shiites outside of Baghdad. Internally, Saddam Hussein placed security into the hands of his two sons, who showed even greater ruthlessness and notoriously sadistical brutality against opponents at home and abroad.

All this went on under the nose of UN observers and weapons experts. Each UN resolution to curtail Saddam Hussein and to impose restrictions had been violated by the regime. Saddam Hussein indulged in a cat-and-mouse game with the UN, stalling negotiations, harrassing UN personnel stationed in Iraq, detaining foreigners to use as human shields at military installations against allied bombings, feigning willingness to relent to UN pressure only to turn around and ridicule the West. And there were the daily reminders from the regime, "to use weapons of mass destruction" indiscriminantly in case of attack. Israel - Saddam's pet target - was attacked by 76 missiles at the time of the Kuwaiti liberation in early 1991. At the time Israel refrained from retaliation, in order not to endanger the alliance of 82 nations proceeding against Iraq.

Virtually every day some kingpin of the Iraqi regime came forward with provocations, claiming "thousands of tons of WMDs and the 'progress' in the country's affort to build nuclear weapons." At the UN feverish attempts were under way to make Saddam Hussein accept permanent UN supervision of its weapons build-up. The result was that in 1998 Saddam threw out all UN personnel. The UN "regretted" the lack of co-operation and threatened "most severe consequences."

After the terrorist attacks of September 11 2001, Saddam celebrated the events and pronounced his support for al-Qaeda as well as the uprising in the Palestinian territories (each family of suicide bombers killing Israeli citizens in schools, busses, shops and restaurants received $5,000 from the Iraqi leader) and set in motion clandestine trafficking of weapons into the PLO territories. In Saddam's words, his support for al-Qaeda included the provision of safe haven for the deadly terrorist organisation and help in arming the group with WMDs.

These were claims made by Saddam Hussein, not accusations from Western governments. Even though, UN observers recorded and listed some 48,000 tons (!) of weapons stockpiles classified as potentially with mass destruction in nature. The UN in 1996 and 1997 recorded an elaborate programme of Iraq to obtain and build a huge arsenal of weaponry far exceeding the need for self defence. Frequent threats to invade Saudi Arabia coincided with the findings of the UN.

Exasperated by Iraq's resistance and defiance of past UN resolutions, and by the ongoing atrocities against Iraq's minorities, the UN passed in 2002 a final ultimatum in its Resolution #1441, setting an ultimatum to allow UN observers back into the country and to cease all hostilities and observe the 1991 ceasefire agreement or face "grave consequences." The legal base for the attack on Iraq was laid out.

Iraq refused and sent chilling messages to the world. In case of attack, "Iraq would annihilate Israel and set the world ablaze." It was clear that any military strike, now sanctioned by the UN's final Security Council Resolution, must be swift and overwhelming. US President Bush and British PM Tony Blair were the right men to do just that.

Today, in hindsight, the inquest at a Mickey Mouse court in London is a mockery of the grave danger that Saddam Hussein had posed to the world, and whose removal from power was crucial, necessary and compulsory; and in accordance with UN resolutions.

This kangaroo trial in Little Britain would also have found Winston Churchill guilty for attacking Nazi Germany: the Nazi attack on Poland would not have been reason or justification for attack on Germany, reports of mass murder in German concentration camps not enough reason to embark on bombing raids on German cities, Hitler's and Goebbels' inflammatory rhetoric merely delusional and hypothetical war-mongering; Germany's invasion of the Soviet Union not harmful enough for Britain to intervene.

Tony Blair stands tall and on firm legal and moral grounds today. The London kangaroo court is a fallacy, just an embarrassing footnote - a final one -  in the saga to cleanse the world of a villain. Thank you, prime minister!

Current Music: SUZANNE VEGA  -  The Queen and the Soldier

Wednesday 27 January 2010

HOLOCAUST MEMORIAL DAY

Today is Holocaust Memorial Day, in commemoration of the millions of people murdered by the German death campaign to conquer the world. No other people but the Germans have managed to set up a clockwork operation to perfect methodology and scope of mass murder, and the guilt and shame heaped upon each and every German will remain in place for many generations to come; as it should.

Holocaust Memorial Day (HMD) is commemorated internationally on 27th January each year. This date was chosen as it is the anniversary of the day in 1945 on which the Soviet Army liberated the largest Nazi concentration camp – Auschwitz-Birkenau. The H M Day urges everyone to pause and reflect on what can happen when racism, prejudice and exclusionary behaviour are left unchecked.

Auschwitz-Birkenau is the epitome of all evil, the incarnation of the cruelty of a whole nation and people that had been gripped by the sickening delusion to be above all others and to dominate the world in a perverted megalomaniac strife against anyone not German. In Auschwitz more than one million people, mainly Roma, Sinti and Jews, have been murdered. When Soviet troops liberated the hell-like place barely 8,000 people languished in unimaginable appalling circumstances. In all, the various camps throughout the Nazi-held territories caused the brutal murder of more than 7 million people, and more than 45 million people have been directly victimised by the Germans to-date.

This is a somber day in the history of man. I will attend this evening a service in the memory of the countless murder victims of Satanic Nazi-German atrocities. We all know that the dangers deeply rooted in Germans are very much alive today and that the subdued Teutons have to be kept in check by a watchful international community every day until the end of time.

Tuesday 26 January 2010

La Scala in Haiti

Italian buffoon undermines recovery
in quake-stricken Haiti


The story of an "Italian official" visiting devastated Port-au-Prince over the weekend was widely - and with visible pleasure - reported by the BBC day and night. Guido Bertolaso, head of Italy's "civil protection service" - whatever that means in mafia land - felt the need to travel to the Haitian wasteland nine days after the horrific tremors struck the impoverished country, and in the midst of a frantic search & rescue operation conducted by personnel from 52 nations.

Up to 200,000 people have perished in the quake (1.9% of its population!) - 155,000 alone in the capital - and more than 300,000 suffered injuries; more than 1.4mn people have lost their homes. The quakes destroyed homes, uprooted the government, displaced the nation's president and reduced the UN headquarters in Port-au-Prince to rubble, leaving most of the staff dead. Faced with the utter misery and a looming outbreak of diseases and anarchy, the United States of America led a multi-national response that had commenced within hours of the January 12th disaster.

Ten days later an Italian "senior official" marches in, trumpeting to the world that "It's a terrible situation that could have been managed much better. When there's an emergency, it triggers a vanity parade. Lots of people go there anxious to show that their country is big and important, showing solidarity." Then the asinine Italian tenor comes straight to the point to vent his anti-American sentiment, with delight disseminated by Little Britain's official media outlet, the BBC:  "The US sent too many officers instead of medical help. They don't have a rapport with international organisations and aid groups. We're missing a leader, a coordination capacity that goes beyond military discipline." The BBC then backed up the rhetoric by quoting Venezuela's dictator Hugo Chavez to legitimize the Italian's banter.

What the operatic diva had in mind was a response in line with the Italian government's measures in the wake of quakes there. In May and September 1976 strong tremors shook the Northern Italian region of Friuli, killing more than 1,000 and making some 140,000 people homeless. 33 years later there are still hundreds of families living in the temporary shelters erected by Swiss and German donors back then. More recently, a strong quake in April 2009 in central Italy killed 96 people and destroyed 3,000 homes. Ten months later, more than sixty percent of the displaced people still live in tents on provisional campsites - just 90 miles from Rome.

In contrast, the US Government immediately brought together its resources and various aid organisations, dispatching 18,000 military and aid workers. Washington, instantaneously realizing the scope of the catastrophe, rallied allies like Canada, Mexico, Australia and Britain to join the massive rescue and recovery mission. Canada now spearheads efforts for permanent debt relief and a long-term plan to rebuild Haiti. American citizens opened their heart (and wallet) to raise more than $360mn within 2 days to assist the Caribbean nation; Italians so far have not paid any sizeable contribution for Haiti; not at the scene, nor at home.

To the people of Haiti the message from the Pavaroti-ing Italian minister is clear: when disaster strikes, the United States is a reliable and dependable source of relief, while Italy will march in the vanity parade to ridicule your plight and add insult to injury.

Sunday 24 January 2010

Weekend Fun

London Weekend Fun
Theatre, Pub Crawl, Clubbing;
and recovery...

"Monday I have Friday on my mind," and with the Easybeats song in my head I was looking forward all week to the deja-vu sensation of a stage play revisited which I have read and studied three decades ago: An Inspector Calls, by JB Priestley, at the Wyndham's Theatre in the West End.

The play was superbly staged by a great cast and the story is as vivid and urgent today as it was 70 years ago when it had been written. Set in post-Victorian England the play chastises hypocrisy and moral decay in society, as a wealthy family in the Midlands is confronted with the suicide of a young woman, a death that had much to do with each member of the family, despite early denials at the beginning of an inquest conducted by an anonymous inspector. In the end, long after the investigator has left the house, the family descends into chaos, opening deep fault lines between members across generations on the heels of mutual accusations, attacks and blame.

We were six in our party, evenly split by genders, and we continued a lively debate over the play at the Cork & Bottle pub at nearby Leicester Square. This is not just a pub, but rather a fabulous locale to unwind, find a hidden niche underground for undisturbed tête-à-tête and to vent rhetoric that most will find political incorrect. The C&B serves excellent food, has a great wine list, architecturally interesting - catacombs come to mind - and with excellent service, all at a decent price. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

I got home shortly after 3:30AM. I did not open the curtains before noon...

In the semi-darkness of my room, only disturbed by the bright lights of Anglochat [sarcasm], I sipped my coffee and plotted Saturday night's venues via phone + texts. So much talk of burgers and other culinary atrocities in Anglo I became overwhelmed by a craving for seafood (how novel is that por moi?). I rallied Danielle, Cory, Kim, Geoffrey and John - conference call style - to first drop by my place 8-ish for some snacks (which worked out fine for all) before heading out to the Kensington Wine Bars, my regular hang-out just around the corner from me. Two drinks later we flagged down a cab to drop in at Trader Vic's to deal with that seafood craving of ours and quench the thirst for rum-based exotics. Full and content we took off for Proud over in Camden, a club themed around Indie, Rock, Pop and Burlesque; the main room had a live act that was brilliant. Time flew by, and by 2:30 we tired out from the rave and dance.

I was thankful for Dani's suggestion to return to my place to chill out for a bit, aware of the playlist on the Spotify, the convenient location for all and the Open Bar sign ... lol. By 4:30 four of the five have left and it was time for bed. It's the kinda weekend you work for all week long. Come Monday and I will have yet again Friday on my mind: a return to the Proud for "Tales Of the Unexpected" - an indie-electro-rock party which promises to be great entertainment too.

Current music: REGINA SPEKTOR  -  Fidelity

Thursday 21 January 2010

Anglochat Splinters - Drivel Head



ANGLOCHAT SPLINTERS / VII
KMHii, Drivel Head in Chevy Chase, MD

One of the most pathetic regular occurrences in Anglochat is the font-woman behind the screen name KMHii@aol.com. Commonly known as Karen, or Slushball, our profiled Font of the Week has made Anglochat her primary home since 2004. On average she spends 18 1/2 hours a day in the AOL chatroom, according to witnesses interviewed for this article. Most of the time she transmits desultory soundbites, consisting of fractured sentences with ferocious misspellings that come in no logical sequence to chats by other AOL users.

When the tragedy in Haiti became briefly a topic in the otherwise ignorant and wanton chatroom, Karen randomly fired off garbled messages like, "a bird just hit my window" or "man it is cold." Most of the time the involuntarily comical input serves as relentless bemusement for the driftless audience in Anglochat. But - even though without any educational or life experience credentials herself - she also causes frequently rancor and rebuke with her misplaced condescending remarks that are just feeble attempts to lecture and instruct someone even more adrift than herself, ending in curious exchanges between a one-eyed leading the blind.

Most in Anglochat agree that "Karen has basically lost it." Her psychotic condition has worsened ever since she was made redundant in late 2008, after months of warnings from her then-employer to shape up and concentrate, and following a time when her employment status had been downgraded to "probationary" for various infractions, disciplinary problems and consistently unexcused tardiness. After numerous disciplinary actions did not yield marked changes in Karen's behaviour and in her desolate appearance she was finally dismissed in October 2008.

Since then KMHii has been a full-time resident at Anglochat, ridiculed even by what she calls her friends, and lambasted and "not taken for full" by her numerous foes. She has two imaginary lovers whom she consults when thorny issues, such as being habitually impecunious, arise. Both are medical doctors and "live hundreds of miles away, and always travel around the world anyway" - which suits her just fine. She also claims to have been "with them for more than 14 years" and both are married - which she also finds convenient. Consequently, she finds nothing abnormal to maintain a platonic relationship with two married doctors living far away since she had turned 31 years old.

Our correspondents in the US have provided some of the drivel from Karen. We decided to omit other members from the chat transcript as Karen's spew is random and disconnected from all ongoing chat anyway. The sampled drivel is very recent and has been corroberated by several witnesses.

Current Music: YEAH YEAH YEAHS  -  Heads Will Roll

The best and the worst of KMHii drivel:

Monday 18 January 2010

WC2010 Terrorism Looms



     Concrete threats against WC2010 surface


Police are in panic and try to track down and arrest two black criminals who threatened to murder and rob foreigners during this year's World Cup in interviews broadcast on local television channel e.tv.

Lashing out at e.tv, which broadcast the clandestine interviews on Friday evening, Police Minister Nathi Hoodie Mthethwa accused the station of "reckless harbouring of criminals". But group news editor Ben Said said it was e.News' duty to inform and make aware the public, and Mthethwa was as usual merely shooting the messenger.

Head of Crime Line Yusuf Abramjee said that as one of the government's partners in the fight against crime, they were equally disturbed over the threats. He agreed that it was e.News' duty to inform the public. "We are worried by the utter-ances made by these two self-confessed criminals on a national platform like e.tv. "These two criminals have tormented police publicly and caused mayhem. They must therefore be brought to book and we appeal to anyone with information to help," he said.

The footage had both black criminals' identities hidden - one with a white stocking pulled over his head, the other filmed while loading a firearm - and contained comments that they intended to commit armed robberies and murder during the football showpiece in June and July. Foreigners would be particularly target, terming them as "soft targets" during their suade. They 'justified' their intentions by saying it was repayment for colonial wrongs.

Police chieftain Mthethwa said the men would face charges of contravening the Intimidation Act for their comments which could carry sentences of up to 25 years. Mthethwa's also ranted that e.tv's "repeated airing of this footage constitutes gratuitous sensationalism, promotes unlawfulness and creates a climate of fear and hysteria".

Mr Said defended the station: "While it is unsettling to hear criminals mock police, it remains a reality that the criminals we spoke to do not seem intimidated by the SAPS and their shoot-to-kill statements." Police incompetence is to blame for the mockery and taunting that the public and criminals heap on South Africa's police.

National Police Commissioner and president Zuma's man-friend Bheki Cele called on e.tv to work with the police by providing the identities and locations of the pair. "That, in itself, will be a major contribution in their commitment towards a safer South Africa," he said.

The Zuma underling is unaware of the principal human right of a free press that has an obligation to report the news and protect its sources.

Run-up to Super Bowl XLIV

For me there is only one sport that can excite me: American Football; regardless whether it is College Football (especially the supreme Nittany Lions) or professionals (where my lost heart beats for the 49ers).

Leading up to Super Bowl XLIV on 7 February, the AFC and NFC champions will be decided from this weekend's blockbuster match-ups:

AFC Championship Game / Saturday 23 January
NEW YORK JETS     vs
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS

NFC Championship Game / Sunday 24 January
MINNESOTA VIKINGS vs
NEW ORLEANS SAINTS

My bets are on the Vikings and Colts (but I would like to see the Jets win). For Minnesota Vikings QB Brett Favre this might be his very last shot at a Super Bowl win, and who would want to deny it to him, at age 40? It will not be easy to dismiss the Saints who have had a stellar season so far. The showdown in the NFC will be the most exciting game of the season. After that, even the Super Bowl itself will be the anti-climax.

There is exciting news for this 49ers fan:
The San Francisco 49ers will play the Denver Broncos next season at Wembley Stadium, the fourth straight year the NFL will stage a regular-season game in the British capital. The 49ers will be listed as the home team for the Oct. 31 game. Guess who will be in attendance among the crowd of 81,000 ...  LOL

Friday 15 January 2010

Strafing the Banking Industry

Obama Turns the Tables

New levy on profitable banks is outrageous
In an internal paper and presentation I criticized the Obama Administration's punitive action against profitable financial institutions, its doubtful morality and its logic. Whilst popular with an incited public (and electorate), Obama's war directive against the nation's most successful banks comes just a year after the near-collapse of the international financial system, and possibly just a year ahead of the next, even more abysmal crisis looming.

“I did not run for office to be helping out a bunch of fat-cat bankers,” Barack Obama recently declared. On Thursday January 14th he drove the point home, unveiling a special levy on large financial institutions to cover losses by taxpayers on the Troubled Asset Relief Programme (TARP). The “Financial Crisis Responsibility Fee” will snare around 50 banks and insurers with assets of more than $50 billion — 35 American institutions and 15 or so domestic subsidiaries of foreign firms. Each will pay 0.15% of its eligible liabilities, measured as total assets minus capital and deposits (or, for insurers, policy reserves). Investment banks with few deposits, such as Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley, will be hit much harder than commercial banks, as they only recently started accepting deposits under new legislation that "grants" them full commercial banking licences.

The fee will last a minimum of ten years, and longer if that is necessary to recoup the full cost of TARP. In a statement Mr Obama promised to “recover every single dime the American people are owed". In fact The Treasury expects the fee to raise $90 billion over that period, and that this will be sufficient to cover the final bill—though its most conservative estimate is a loss of $120 billion. Officials argue that, far from springing a surprise on banks, they are following the letter of the law that created the TARP, which called for the bail-out’s costs to be recouped from the financial sector by 2013.

The politics of the levy are clear. As banks’ pockets bulge again, they grow less popular. According to a Bloomberg poll conducted in December, 64% of Americans vindictively think bailing them out was a mistake. Legislators are under pressure to respond to this ignorant anger, especially those facing mid-term elections in November.

WC2010: Gloom & Doom

The World Cup 2010, to be staged in several South African towns in five months time, threatens to be a fiasco for the host nation as much as FIFA. Billions of dollars have been wasted in stadia that will be of no practical use after the 3-week tournament. The pace of ticket sales is the worst since World War II, and thousands of criminal gangs prepare to pounce on the few tourists willing to face winter climate in June. The financial disaster that looms large now is paired by the public relation nightmare for South Africa.

After the harshest winter in the northern hemisphere in decades, only a few idiots and die-hard fans are willing to prolong the seasonal cold in SA. Even less people will be willing to expose themselves to the risk to health and life, with gangs roaming freely the streets of South African cities and frequent attacks on foreigners, routinely posing as initiations for new gang members following a plot known as "kill a tourist a day." Even war experienced Africans stay away from the World Cup, according to preliminary sales figures. Just 1.1mn of the 3.2mn available tickets have been allocated by now, with some 250,000 tickets given away for free. Most matches will have difficulties to attract 20,000 spectators into a stadium, and the matches of England have outsold even those of the home team!

FIFA is alarmed that the matches will take place in half-empty stadia. Sales of tickets should be near 100% of available tickets, based on the past 6 World Cup tournaments. For the first time in 50 years it is also expected that the home team "Bafana" will be ousted after the first round.

Financial ineptitude, inability to maintain public safety, incompetence with managing the infrastructure of transport, energy, water and housing, notoriety of corruption and a total failure as a team will render the 2010 World Cup as the worst ever.

Sales figures - on average running 90 per cent behind FIFA's projections - show the dismal interest in South Africa as a sports venue:

as of 14 January - 11 days before deadline:
  Country      Tickets allocated  Tickets sold
----------------------------------------------
South Africa       535,000          276,300 (196,000 free or 1/2 price)
U K                 48,000            3,770
Germany             38,000            2,420
France              39,000            2,670
Netherlands         40,000            6,220
Denmark             17,260            1,577
Italy               33,600            1,990
Switzerland         23,600              857
African nations    600,000           81,330


Organisers - barely deserving the label - already plan to have a fire sale of tickets days ahead of the June 11th start, reducing the price of half of the unsold tickets from £11.50 to £5.00, and give away the other half to impoverished South Africans. With such plans already announced, who can blame fans for waiting until then, rather than buying tickets now?

Current music: THE DUKE SPIRIT - Cuts Across the Land

Thursday 14 January 2010

Say Cheese!

Le fromage à la maison - well, how I enjoyed it last night...

Du fromage servait à Le Château Euro

Tuesday 12 January 2010

Anglochat Splinters: member profile



ANGLOCHAT SPLINTERS / VI
Da Crew member LameDucks



A helpful clandestine correspondent of CEB who is embedded with the renegade slum herd known as Da Crew, has landed a major coup by taking a picture of AOL screen name LameDucks and smuggling it out of the gang's compound and to publish it through our blogsite.


"To all the girls I've stalked before, to all their dad's I've mocked before..."

The infamously destitute pedophile from a remote desolate part of Scotland, who has had frequent run-ins with the law for a variety of petty crimes and has to register as a sex offender at the place of abode, has been on a steady decline ever since he was divorced from his first wife in 1976. In the court's ruling at the time the judge cited LameFuck's incessant recitals of Willie Nelson and Kenny Rogers songs, delivered in his trademark high pitched voice and at a noise level above 60 decibels.

Our embedded correspondent's capture of the image above will certainly lead to raging fury from the Crew, but will also assist law enforcement agencies to apprehend what is commonly perceived as a public nuisance.

Current music: KASABIAN - Thick As Thieves

Remembering a quiet heroine

Miep Gies

Last night I watched Anne Frank Remembered on BBC4, a widely acclaimed and recognised, harrowing account of Anne Frank's years in hiding with her family from 1942-1944, in her own words. Betrayed on August 4th, 1944 the hunkered down family was picked up by German thugs in police uniforms during a raid on their hideout, leaving behind a diary that depicts the moving descriptions of an ever worsening situation through the eyes of a free-spirited girl entrapped by vicious circumstances imposed by the German machinery of death in Europe.

The broadcast - by sheer coincidence - was aired at the same hour as the person responsible for the discovery and safe-keeping of the diary died, just 3 weeks ahead of her 101st birthday.

Condolences go out to the family and friends of Miep Gies who died on 11 January 2010. She was the last surviving helper of the eight inhabitants of the Secret Annexe and the person who found Anne's diary after their arrest in August 1944. For two years Miep Gies helped the Frank family through the ordeal of hiding in confined space, providing food, clothes, books and learning material for the two Frank sisters as well as information on developments in the war - always under the threat of being herself uncovered and facing death for assisting Jewish in hiding.

Miep Gies was born in Vienna on 15th February 1909. She came to the Netherlands when she was 11 years old and in 1933 began work at Otto Frank's company Opekta. Following the invasion of Holland by the Nazis, and along with other helpers, Miep brought spiritual support and friendship to her Jewish friends in hiding.

"The helpers, who have managed to pull us through so far...never...uttered a single word about the burden we must be."
Anne Frank, 28 January 1944 (aged 15)

Monday 11 January 2010



ANGLOCHAT SPLINTERS / V
Definition: Da Crew


Da Crew member, a nefarious, flagitious, decrepit, sly, nasty, troublesome, bad-tempered, racist, intolerant and foul-smelling character who, for reasons never fully explained, lives in a cave above the town.

Whether it is ScuntHORPE, a ghetto suburb of Chicago, a ramshackle slum dwelling on the Mississippi River in rural Alabama, a delapidated and deprived spot in a French dump or in the Brittany wasteland, the Crew member will always badger randomly and incoherently to infest and to girdle places of civilisation, marking the crew's territory like an incontinent rancid dog and waling with high pitched squeals that can shatter glass.

Current music: THE RAVEONETTES: Sad Transmission

Sunday 10 January 2010

Anglochat Splinters: Mature vs Manure



ANGLOCHAT SPLINTERS / Part IV
Age versus Rage

Our Scotland correspondent has provided transcripts from the AOL chatroom Anglochat that once again shows the wide range of obscene banter from a gang of destitute lowlives that make up what the ghetto freaks themselves call Da Crew. The hoodlum band of proletarian plebs currently consist of AOL screen names CarrCarter39, ChristielakeV63, Loveinamist30, Brandi620, Lovemyroo2 and Vinplant, and also embraces Palaminogirl123, Thistles1234, Sugarpihnybunch and LameDucks on a lapdog status. Lowest in the pecking order of the rancid dogs is KMHii, whose months of dutifully yapping "LMAO, LOL or Hahhahahahahahahaha" after each of the Crew member's lines finally paid off for her. Being made redundant in real life in October 2008, KMHii has both the necessary credentials of being unsurpassably stupid and with plenty of time at her hand to represent the Crew in the chatroom and report back to the key bitches of the rancid pack. Her efforts to qualify for disability benefits have failed twice in 2009, despite clear signs of terminal illness and sickly appearance. The State of Maryland however sees in her merely a job-shy slacker, a view shared by most in Anglochat.

The vile spew from the Crew is well documented, yet its vile infamy can still surprise. Last night, in the middle of a zoo-like suade of hideous and profane banter from six of the Crew who had added "poopoo" as ID to identify each other, a widely esteemed AOL chatter entered the room and dared to mention the clear room disruptions from the few. Screen name Thephx2, a 70+ year old well respected and liked man from Phoenix, was immediately swarmed by the rat pack and attacked for his appeals to common sense, decency and normal behaviour. Our correspondent provided excerpts of the hounding of a universally recognised gentleman whose role is somewhat that of an alderman of the ethical chatroom audience. It was curious to watch how quickly KMHii chose to join the bullying obscenities by the Crew and abandon her years of pitiful and shameful pretense of feigned friendship to a highly appreciated senior citizen. Rats have to resort to preying on the perceived weakest, and the Crew followed nature's axiom to the letter once again.

Current music: GLISS - Kissing the Boulevard

Bar Essentials



OK, Here's the logic: I'm a member of Littlewoods for a couple of years and bought quite a lot over time mainly for the convenience of delivery. This week I decided that I got tired of the Abseil routine from the bedrooms to the kitchen and to schlepp either a stereo or the laptop to the kitchen to keep me entertained while cooking. So I checked the Philips stereo system I wanted with Littlewoods and was delighted to see that they just reduced their price from 149.00 to 139.00.

Now comes the logical part. Before I ordered I checked with Amazon.co.uk and wouldn't you know, it was for £83.00! There was no stopping me, and - logically - I have saved £56.00 on the day. The saving came just in time for our monthly Thai Curry Challenge (TCC), when four of us challenge each other to complete a four course dinner, one course hotter than the other (the starters start with 4 peppers on the menu, course 2,3 and 4 have the top 5 peppers). Usually it takes place at a fine Thai restaurant in Camden, where even the staff shows respect and amazement that they just cannot serve a dish that would make EURO quit before finishing. OK, pertruding veins on the forehead, temporary outbreak of sweat, teary eyes and / or migraine-like headache occasionally temper the sense of triumph, but only temporarily. As all four of us eat and drink the same (the event is prepaid), we always pool the costs. This time, however, with the savings from the purchase of the audio system, I threw in £40.00 into the pool, leaving the balance of £60.00 to the other three. We also decided to eat at my place rather than in the restaurant this time, as a cold spell made the customary post-dinner bar crawl a less attractive option than usual. For the price of £100.00 we also got six menues to go for the 4 of us, as we saved (again!) on the drinks (not on tips which we always pay happily for the always impeccable service).

Needless to say that the meals last night were perfect, pipping hot when delivered, and that I won yet again. We had 11 'monthlies' in 2009 of which I won seven times. Some(one) Like(s) It Hot...

The rest of the money saved went also for a good, common purpose: coffe, cordials and Thorntons accessories rounded out a perfectly entertaining evening.

Current music: NENEH CHERRY - Woman

Thursday 7 January 2010

Brown-out and Snow White


 Resuming at work looms large this coming Monday and it will not be a piece of Angel Cake to get back to the routine of rat-racing in the City. But, to quote 007, "England needs me," so I'll be there.

Memories of the warmth of South Africa are glowingly alive, and I regret some of the things I have said about her in recent months. Not because it was wrong to say, but unbalanced and unfair. South Africa is the most beautiful country in the world, its diverse population a mirror image of the world, the cradle of civilisation and by all descriptions in world literature of paradise, South Africa fits the bill closest of all.

My return to England had a big and pleasant surprise in store: snow. Not just a feeble attempt to sugar-coat a Labour fiefdom of imbeciles and slackers, no: a thick blanket of brilliant white fluff. Being philosophical about it, Britain's dark spots are covered by a layer of immaculate white powder. Rough edges are smoothened, unevenness in the landscape levelled, cars rendered useless, frolicking children everywhere - Britain's best snowfall in 30 years transformed the normally drab entity into a winter wonderland.

The early days of January have also dealt another blow to the Labourites trolling the country since 1996. The third attempt to oust the moronic Scotsman from Downing Street may have fizzled, but the rebellious contentions from some senior Labourites in Westminster just weeks ahead of a general election show massive tectonic cracks within the Party's ranks. The air of change blows through Britain, bringing along precipitation of beautiful stuff from above, and a death blow for Britain's most behated prime minister in history. 2010 will be a great year.

Current music: IAN BROWN - Just Like You